The situation I wrote about in my last post that we heard about and thought we were being considered for obviously did not amount to us getting a baby. After lots of nothing, we found out the birth mom decided to parent without looking at anyone's book. This was very upsetting at first. Then, I thought of reasons it wasn't upsetting:
1. How can I be upset with a mother who decides to keep her child?
2. At least she didn't look at our book and decide we weren't good enough.
3. Were we ready? Probably not. We obviously could have been if we got picked, but I think this is better.
4. That's not OUR baby. =)
After that whole situation, I began to get used to waiting. Don't get me wrong, my heart still skips a beat every time I get an e-mail from Geralyn or a phone call from an unknown number. The disappointment every time it's not "the call" becomes a bit easier.
We went to our adoption class in December. I had no idea what to expect from this. Wasn't sure if it was a parenting class or what. It was really a class about the hardships of adoption, adoption from the birth parents' points of view, and other emotional stuff. It was really worthwhile, in my opinion. A few adoptive families spoke about their experiences and it's crazy how different each experience can be. I had not spent a lot of time thinking about how this process will be for the birth parents. They will be in our lives forever as well. What a crazy realization that was. One of the best things was this video!!! (Check it out, you won't be sorry. It'll give you a good laugh)
Christmas was great! I tried to take advantage of it being our last (hopefully) Christmas without a child ;-). My Mom got me a few baby things here and there, which made me happy! AND Aunt Jan and Aunt Di bought presents for future baby Malo: a painting to go in baby's room and some awesome books. That warmed my heart more than they will ever know.
We got an update from Geralyn last week and it sounds like we have moved up the waiting list 11 spots because 11 families took babies home over the past 6 months. A lot of the placements have been with 48 hour notice or less. That is so crazy to wrap my mind around, but that very well could be the way it happens. And that's okay.
As for now, we are enjoying life as two adults without chlidren. We have several trips planned and are going out as often as we want, sleeping a lot, and enjoying this chapter of our life that is (hopefully) coming to a close soon. My heart still yearns for my future baby when I am around my friends and their babies, or when I see a cute baby at the mall, or especially when I see adorable toddlers at Disney experiencing it for the first time.
But...I'm okay. It will be us soon enough. Our baby is out there.
Until next time...
"DNA doesn't make a family, love does" - The Fosters